Why come along to Counselling?

...Because we all have challenges, dreams, hopes, fears, troubled relationships, pain, shame, sadness, stress, anxiety, anger, loss.... the list goes on. These things are part of our individual (and inner) world and it can be lonely wrestling with them. Sharing our struggles with friends and family isn't always possible. Often when we share these things, we risk (un-intended) judgement from others, sometimes we risk the fear of hurting other people, and we risk the pain of receiving advice that misses the mark and leaves us feeling misunderstood. Humans are drawn to others for connection and support, the trouble is, many people aren't really sure how to help. It can be tricky, but we actually need other people to help ourselves heal, progress and feel better. So... who can you talk to? Share with? Feel with? Heal with? This is where counselling can step in, and step up.

Counselling at its heart, is about healing our emotional pains while in connection to another. Our brains and our nervous system are hard wired (not battery operated. HARD WIRED) to turn to others for safety and support. A trained counsellor learns the value and the skills of tuning into another person. To really hear them. To join with them in their journey and deeply understand it. From this base, a counsellor and the open and curious person sitting with them, can work through a person’s particular challenges in their own particular way. It becomes a creative partnered journey of insight, exploration, trying new ways, testing old ways, and ultimately moving in a (mostly) forward direction towards more health, wellness, wisdom, inspiration and fulfilment. Want to give it a try? Reach out... I'm all ears.

For those interested in the labels and details:

I work mostly from a trauma-informed, person-centred perspective. I have a humanistic integrative approach, blending in elements of:

• Gestalt Therapy. Although counselling is a talk therapy, Gestalt is an experiential talk therapy which allows for playing around with some abstract and metaphorical activities.

• Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT). ACT is part of the new wave of Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT). It’s a more gentle and ‘feeling’ version of CBT. Behaviour is seen more as a by-product and not the main focus.

• Positive Psychology. This is NOT toxic positivity - it's about what makes life worth living. What's working. What’s good and how can we leverage this and cultivate more of it.

• Equine Psychotherapy. A blend of Gestalt, Mindfulness, Neuroscience, Buddhist psychology and Somatic Inquiry.

I work with people with no labelled mental illness diagnosis, and also those who have received a diagnosis (or two). Please contact me to chat about your particular circumstances.

Note: I have experience in counselling within the NDIS support field. Please contact me to discuss sessions for NDIS participants.

What is Coaching? 

There are so many types of coaches and forms of coaching out there -  life coaching, business coaching, sport coaching, mindfulness coaching - basically you can add the word coaching to almost any aspect of your life, and you can probably find a coach who specialises in each one. Finding the right coach is about who and what kind of coach/coaching is best for you.

In coaching sessions, I working using coaching psychology. This is an evidence based psychological technique. Sessions are goal orientated, and collaborative. This means that together we determine the goal you hope to achieve (you may already have a your goal in mind) and together we will refine your goal and work towards it. We work in a partnership, focused on exploring all facets of your goal including your motivations, blocks, challenges, plans and accountability.

Coaching is a personal awareness and personal development experience. It involves looking at, and thinking about things differently. And ultimately, we find information, supports, and answers as we uncover them, from within yourself. Coaching via coaching psychology is about walking along side you and asking good thought-provoking questions while cheering you on to uncover the strengths that lie within, and the insights that guide you best, to get to where you want to go!

Here are some coaching goal examples (note that ANYTHING is okay to bring to coaching):

• “I want to improve my health”

• “I want a better social life”

• “I want to understand myself more”

• “I want to be better”

• “I would like to change career/job”

• “I want to be more calm/assertive/happy/friendly...”

• “I want to manage my time/finances/household/business better”

• “I want to be a better friend”

• “I want to speak up!”

• “I want to exercise more/run a marathon/get better at my sport...”

Literally, your coaching goal and objective is as limitless as the sky. Bring your ideas, however refined or vague they might be, and let’s explore and move forward together!

NOTE: I hold a degree with the title ‘Bachelor of Counselling (Coaching)'. Studying coaching psychology and meeting required practical hours of 1:1 coaching was a significant component of my degree. This has enabled me to be eligible for ACC Accreditation with the International Coaching Federation (ICF). This means that I am accountable to uphold a code of ethics and standards when coaching, just like when counselling. Integrity is one of my top professional values, so it’s important for me to let you know how I received my training and what holds me to account!

Connected Catch Up

A, what? Yep, a Connected Catch Up. That’s what I call it. It’s a chat between a couple of friends and a counsellor/coach (that's me), so that we can deepen your ‘deep and meaningful conversations’ with extra psychological based insights, theories, activities, and ideas.

Think for a moment about your friends... who is it that you have great deep and meaningful conversations with? That friend who likes to chat about the things that mean a lot to you. Conversations with this friend do not revolve around events, the weather, and the jobs that need to be done. Deep and meaningful conversations are about what has meaning in your life and your inner world.

Do you know the kind of conversations I’m talking about?

Do you know why they help us feel good? There’s evidence behind it:

• Humans are social creatures and our neurobiology develops and changes throughout our lives with significant influence from our social experiences. When it comes to our wellbeing, conversations matter!

• Humans are meaning-making machines. We seek to make meaning out of our experiences. Exploring the things that have meaning in our lives, in connection with others, allows our brains to do what they were made to do - connect the dots!

• Talking about our emotions, thoughts, and ideas brings us (and our nervous system and our neurobiology) into a state of safety, connection, and regulation.

• Research shows that connecting with others in meaningful ways, tends to make us happier and improve wellbeing.

What does a Connected Catch Up look like? Come along with your deep and meaningful friend, I’ll make us all a cuppa, and you can bring the topics you’ve been discussing or want to discuss. One example from the pair of friends who sparked my Connected Catch Up idea was a conversation about, “Who am I? Who am I really?”. There are loads of conversations and personal exploration activities we can have around this topic! Be prepared for me to jump up and start white-boarding and workshopping our conversation as it flows. For your next coffee catch up, why not come along and share it with me? 

☕️

Connected Creative

Carrie Fisher once famously said, 

“Take your broken heart, and make it into art.”

And so many of us do this. We write, we paint, we make music, we decorate. We create.

There is so much research that supports the creative process for personal healing, wellbeing and health. But in todays world, being busy, social, and ‘productive’ is often valued above being quiet, alone, and creative... so sometimes we hide our creations, in fear of judgement. We might slip creative moments into the cracks of our lives and keep our art to ourselves. By doing so, we deny the world of knowing the beauty and the pain inside our soul.

(But... do you kinda want to share it?)

Do you want to explain it? Learn, through talking about it? Heal, through experiencing another person connect to, appreciate, and validate the pain and the beauty of what was inside you, that needed out? Maybe creating is something you do openly, but no-one seems to ‘get’ what you’re trying to express?

Of course, as Edgar Degas said, “Art is not what you see, but what you make others see”.... It is true that art evokes curiosity and meaning in others that is specific to them. BUT what about what you, as the creator see?

Connected Creative is an opportunity to share with me what you have inside of you. Maybe it’s years of poetry hidden away in your notebooks in a box under your bed? Maybe it’s a few incomplete pieces of composed music that you play in the safety of solitude? A beloved sketch book. A journal. A novel. Lyrics. Letters. Water colours, day dreams, outfits, garden design, dance....

Whatever is in your heart to create, you can bring it into a Connected Creative session. We can get to know it and appreciate it. And as creations are born from within you, we can explore its origins and messages, and you can learn more about yourself in the validating and supportive company of an interested and caring counsellor. I am not looking for what is wrong with you embedded in your art - I am simply looking to see, you. Because as a therapist, I know and believe that being truely seen by another is healing. We put ourselves out there in the world every single day - but how often is what we put out, really seen?

“I think everything in life is art. What you do. How you dress. The way you love someone, and how you talk. Your smile and your personality. What you believe in, and all your dreams. The way you drink your tea. How you decorate your home. Or party. Your grocery list. The food you make. How your writing looks. And the way you feel. Life is art.” - Helena Bonham Carter

It is my honour and privilege to be connected and creative with you. 

♡